Chocolate Pie and layers of goodness

Today I am writing about chocolate pie.  But ya’ll know me…I cannot leave it at that.  There is more to say.  So I must say it.  I have so many thoughts rattling/whirling around in my head all the time and some times I manage to corral them into some sort of cohesive statement.  Or I give it my best shot anyway.  Lately, I have become very conscious of the pressure on our social media networks to  be the best parent ever in the whole world.  The parent who does enough, but not too much.  The parent who knows the right thing to say, always.  The parent who is calm, rational, soft spoken yet firm, attentive always…you know what I mean…titles that get posted to our news feed like..”Awesome…you just broke your child” or “hands free mama…how to be one?”  or “enjoying the moments because you are lucky dammit to have these kids”.  Now, I am not saying that this is unnecessary, but I am saying I feel it is a bit too much.  It is getting nauseating.  I find myself reluctant to click and read the post because since I am not the perfect parent, I might see proof of this in what must be the Bible of parenting.  Now, I believe in good doses of self awareness from time to time.  There is always room to step up our game.  As parents, teachers, office administrators, doctors, grocery store clerks…whatever your vocation, nothing wrong with doing your best.  These little blurbs that bombard my news feed are about doing the impossible.  Being the perfect parent.  Sure, there is room for us to put the iphone down and be in the moment more.  There is room for us to yell less and use our calm voices more.  But as a mom of 4 kids, some days that is more feasible than others.  Most of these theories only work if you parent in a bubble.  And your child is perfect.  And you are starring in a sitcom where conversations are scripted.  And it will all work out nicely in 30 minutes.  That, my friends, is not life.  That is a television show.  Parenting in real life is like a comedy mixed with a horror movie with just a little fantasy thrown in.  Parenting has many faces.  Childhood has many faces.  Some of them are picture perfect and others are hide that picture ugly.  Some moments, days, nights, weeks are easier than others.    It is not all homogeneous, it has layers.  Kind of like this pie.  To dissect this chocolate pie and look at it layer by layer, would be unfair.  Because it takes all the layers to make this luscious chocolate pie the delicious delight (say that 3 times fast!!!) that it is.  Same thing with being a parent or child.  No parent is all good or all bad.  No child is either.  And sometimes the good parent and good child come together to make a lovely parenting moment.  I love those.  But on the flip side, sometimes, more than any of us care to admit, the less than good parent and less than good child come together to make one hot mess.  Or one rough morning.  Or evening.  I do not love those.  You cannot look at those moments as making up the whole of the parent or child.  You have to look at the entire pie.  ALLLLL the layers, ya’ll.  That is where the goodness is.  That is where it all comes together.  Lately, my youngest has been giving me fits.  I will admit it.  He is 5 and his own person.  I am working on adjusting my parenting style to suit who he is as a person.  But heaven help me, I am having to pray my way through it.  We have had some less than stellar moments lately.  Some of which I am not proud of.  But I know that this is not all there is to it.  He is a wonderful, scrumptious, precious little boy.  With one heck of a wild streak.  And I am a loving, devoted, involved mommy…who is just feeling a little overwhelmed lately.  That does not make me good or bad.  That does not make him good or bad.  We are probably somewhere in between.  But the love is there.  Not every moment can be whipped cream on top perfect.  And that, sweet friends, is just the way it is.  This does not make the pie any less sweet or delicious.  Thanks for hearing me out.  I really want to share the pie recipe with you, but I also wanted to say let’s be real.  Stop expecting so much of ourselves as parents.  Stop reading those things that dissect our parenting and pick it apart…that is only a little bitty small part…not the whole pie.  I, for one, am working on accepting the layers of my baby boy.  His sweet tender soft side, his fierce proud side, his wild side and so on.  They all make up who my precious boy is.  And I love that. ~AMB

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His determined, stubborn side

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His wild silly side

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His sweet delicious side…

Chocolate Pie (from the kitchen of my friend Betsy)

Stuff You Need~

1 graham cracker pie crust or Oreo cookie pie crust (the ready made kind)

1-8 ounce tub of Cool-Whip

2 (3 ounce) boxes of  INSTANT chocolate pudding

3 ounces of semi-sweetened bakers chocolate

1/4 cup sweetened condensed milk

2 cups cold milk

What to do with the Stuff~

Melt the 3 oz. of chocolate in the microwave (in a microwave safe bowl).  When it is melted, stir in the 1/4 cup condensed milk.  Pour this into the bottom of the pie crust.

Now, in a medium size bowl, whisk together the pudding mix and the milk.  Spoon 1 1/2 cups of this mixture into the pie crust.  Now, mix 1/2  of the tub of Cool Whip with the rest of the pudding mixture.  Stir to combine.  Smooth this on top of the other layer.  Top the pie with the remainder of the Cool Whip.  Let this cool in the fridge for several hours or overnight.  Enjoy the layers of lusciousness, my friends.  And a shout to my good friend Betsy B. for this wonderful recipe she got from her cousin’s wife, Mandy!! Gotta love how good recipes get around!!

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Layer number one..

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Layer number 2…we are getting there…gotta love some  layers…

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It all comes together nicely doesn’t it?  YUMMMMM

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Only 1 layer would be so boring!!!  

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Me and my sweet, rough, wild, loving little boy…this sums it up.  lol!

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